The EFT Healing Centre Blog
May 13, 2013
We have been taught that by asking the right questions we get the right answers. The same is true in EFT tapping. To get the EFT results you want you need to get specific, to dig deep down into the core of the issue.
Last weekend, I taught my EFT Level 1 Workshop, the Essentials of EFT, to a fabulous group of people wanting to develop their EFT skills.
One of the teaching segments is on how to get specific when you tap. One of the biggest impediments to successful EFT results that I observe in clients and new students is when they are too global in how they are describing the problem.
Of course, to them, when they start tapping, the ‘problem’ they are presenting doesn’t seem “global” at all – it seems very real, very present, and very exact.
However, most often, when you present a problem, it is usually a deeply rooted belief (e.g. I’m not good enough), or a physical experience (e.g. I have a migraine), or a strong emotion (e.g. I’m overwhelmed). This is actually the symptom showing up; the surface level experience. When we tap we need to address what has caused that symptom to show up in the first place.
This could be a specific event, or series of events. It could be a message you heard or observed, modeled to you by a person in authority. It could have been a way of life that was very familiar and normal to you.
When we tap, it is those things that we need to be addressing: those specific events, and those messages we heard or saw and took on as truth.
When we address those root causes, we do get the results we want when we tap.
When you decide to tap on a problem, make sure you are clear on the following:
- When did this problem start? That is, when were you first aware of feeling the way you do, either physically or emotionally? E.g. when was the first time you considered you were not good enough? When did you have your first migraine? When did you start to feel overwhelmed?
- Have you answered the “W” questions? Who was involved? What happened? When did it happen? Where did it happen? Why did you respond the way you did at the time?
- Consider how you feel NOW about presenting the problem. Perhaps you feel angry, hopeless, sad, etc. Make sure you incorporate that into your tapping.
- How is your body feeling right now? Don’t forget, your body responds to unresolved painful past experiences by trying to protect you from experiencing them again. Observe how your body feels as you recall that past event, and notice how your body response changes as you tap.
Now you have the specifics, you are ready to get tapping! Imagine you are describing the experience to a close friend or loved one, and vent as you tap. When tapping takes you to the core of your problem, the EFT results you get will help with the root cause of the problem. You’ll be amazed at how quickly you experience deep transformation – far quicker than if you were to tap mechanically on presenting the symptom.
April 4, 2013
How often do you hear yourself saying, “I really want to _____________, but I feel so stuck”? What would it take to get “unstuck?”
Even though we consciously want to move out of “stuckness” and into a different reality, there is most usually a very powerful part of us which absolutely refuses to let go and create the changes we desire and deserve.
Stepping into the unknown can be scary, but what if it could also be exciting, exhilarating, and expansive?
Fear and excitement come from the same place, so what if, in actuality, you aren’t afraid, but you are excited about the possibilities that await you!
What if instead of feeling stuck you look forward to becoming unstuck? What are the possibilities then? Does the vision of a new world unfold in front of you? Has your perspective shifted?
The language we use in EFT plays a huge part in shifting our perspective, and I’ve been playing around with the 3 R’s recently: Reluctance, Resistance, and Refusal.
When we accept the subconscious for the crucial role it plays – to protect us, or else – and we combine that with language that acknowledges that part of our mind, we are able to create the changes we’re looking for.
So when you start with the EFT set up, acknowledge the powerful subconscious: speak its language, comment on its reluctance to let go of existing behaviour patterns and its resistance to release old beliefs, and observe shifts happening much more quickly. Notice how you feel when you change the language from “I feel so stuck” to “I’m getting unstuck.”
If you are new to EFT, click on tapping points to view a map of the meridian points.
You may find the following useful:
Even though I refuse to __________________ [and state what that it is that you want, e.g. stop smoking, be organized and tidy, complete my book, etc ], I’m also really excited to _______________.
Even though I am resistant to __________________ I’m also really excited to __________________.
Even though I’m reluctant to _________________, I’m also really excited to ________________.
Head: I refuse to __________
Eyebrow: I’m resistant to ____________
Side of eye: I’m reluctant to ____________
Under eye: Maybe I’m scared to ___________
Under nose: maybe I’m excited to _______________
Chin: I’m open to the possibility I can ______________
Collarbone: I’m ready and willing to ______________
Under arm: I deserve to ________________.
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. Notice any changes you may feel in your body after tapping. You might find that you need to repeat this process as new aspects emerge. Also, remember that the phrases you use are simply a way of outwardly expressing how you’re feeling. You don’t need to be creative or get hung up on finding the “perfect” wording – just state what’s on your mind.
March 13, 2013
How much do you really love yourself? In Gary Craig’s basic recipe he initially recommended we say the phrase, “Even though ___________, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Deeply and completely love and accept yourself!
When I teach EFT Level 1, we discuss the use of this phrase: can it be embraced with ease and believability, or does it create resistance from the start?
My friend and colleague, Paul Zelizer, taught me the delightful phrase, “Even though this could be true [whatever the problem stated is], I’m willing to treat myself with a little more kindness and gentleness.” I love it! I love how EFT can be kind, and gentle, and I love that – in this crazy world of doing and having – we can take a moment to consider being kind to ourselves.
This year has been all about being kind and gentle to myself. I have said ‘no’ more times than ‘yes’ when the situation didn’t feel light, easy or comfortable. I’ve taken each day as it comes. I’ve scheduled “ME” time. Please know, this may sound like common sense, but it is a world apart from my old behaviour patterns.
The biggest way I’ve acknowledged myself so far this year, and one of the things I said ‘yes’ to, is to meet on Skype with my fabulous coaches at the EFT Healing Centre, Larisse and Sophie every morning at 7am. I am NOT a morning person at all, so believe me this is a real stretch for me!!
We spend about 45 minutes focusing on what we would like to accomplish (rather than repeating old behaviour patterns). We take it in turns and lead one another through a process which for me, is the ultimate in self love, self care, and self fulfilment.
The process isSasha Allenby’s Field Clearing Technique, which I learned when she came to Vancouver in 2011. It’s beautifully simple, yet profound. It’s a way of releasing the unhelpful behaviour patterns or limiting beliefs and creating a new, vibrant, fulfilling reality. We use all the senses which makes it very impactful.
What I love the most about the process is that she recommends you do it every day for 21 days. To me, this shows real commitment to yourself and your well being, and real self love! Once we’ve completed the process, I am fully energized, I’m excited to start my day, I’m truly grateful, and I’m completely focused. How does it get any better than that?
I highly recommend you play with this process – honour yourself with some care and time each day, love yourself, and marvel as miracles start to happen in your life!
Building a New Habit or Behaviour using EFT & Matrix Reimprinting
Tap on the karate chop point and say: “Even though I haven’t always (positive behaviour), I deeply and completely accept myself.” (Repeat three times).
Keep your eyes closed for the remainder of the technique, and tap on the following points while saying the statements listed in the following sequence:
- Top of your head: “I haven’t always (positive behaviour)”
- Inner eyebrow: “I want to always (positive behaviour)”
- Side of the eye: “I choose to always (positive behaviour)”
- Under the eye: “I love to always (positive behaviour), because…” and then list all the reasons why you want to carry out the positive behaviour, either in your mind or out loud
- Under the nose: As you tap, ask yourself what your life would look like if you carried out the positive behaviour. Either verbalize or bring to mind all the positive images you associate with carrying out the positive behaviour
- Chin: As you tap, ask yourself what you would hear if you carried out the positive behaviour. What would you expect to hear others saying about you? And what would you be saying about yourself? You can say these out loud if it helps you to resonate with them more
- Collar bone: As you tap, ask yourself what action you would need to take in order to regularly carry out this behaviour. Either verbalise the actions, or just bring them to mind
- Under the arm: As you tap, ask yourself how you would feel if you frequently or constantly carried out the positive behaviour. Get into the feeling space of carrying out the positive behaviour. If you are having trouble accessing this, try and remember a time in your life when the behaviour wasn’t present. Allow the feelings of carrying out the positive behaviour to move through your whole body
- Thumb: As you tap, choose one image that you associate with the positive behaviour. Be sure that you are in the image and take this image into your mind
- Index finger: As you tap, with the image in your mind, picture all the neurons in your brain reconnecting to make this image your reality
- Middle finger: As you tap, send a signal to every cell in your body that the positive behaviour is your new reality
- Fourth finger: As you tap, take the new image into your heart
- Little finger: As you tap, make all the colours around the image really strong and bright, and get in touch with all the positive emotions that you associate with the image
- Wrist: As you tap, send the new image out into the field. Spend a minute or two doing this so there is a very strong sense of the new image out there
- Karate chop point: As you tap, bring to mind all the things you are grateful for in relation to your new behaviour. You can list these silently or out loud. Then do the Happy Dance to celebrate your new successes!
Adapted from Sasha Allenby’s Field Clearing Technique. You can visit Sasha’s new website: http://theawakeningmovement.com/
February 21, 2013
In Shakespeare’s famous soliloquy, Hamlet weighs the measures of life, ” To be or not to be, that is the question…”
This quote recently came to mind and a thought occurred to me that I was witnessing a parallel here, but that perhaps the more appropriate question would be “To numb out or not to numb out” … whether ’tis nobler to numb out the pain or to experience the feelings of being alive.
Numbing out is a common default mechanism that we resort to as a result of having experienced severely stressful experiences in our life.
A few weeks ago I started working with the most beautiful client. She had been carrying the unresolved wounds of sexual abuse since childhood and her body had started to “shout out” in pain.
The most incredible releases happened during, and following, the first session, but by the time she came for her second session, she had experienced three “big T” traumas (in the space of a week) involving friends and family members. She told me briefly what had happened, and I suggested that we address those events immediately.
Her response to that didn’t surprise me because I’d heard it in the past: “No, I’d rather forget about those and continue working on the original problem”. AKA, I’d rather push it all down, and soldier on. It was easier to allow the default numb out mechanism in than experience the pain.
I took some time to explain how these events may have been even more impactful because of the original problem we’d started to address, and that it was all interconnected in some way. I also suggested that she’d had a lifetime of ignoring – or squashing down – her immediate emotions, so now would be the perfect time to break that pattern and actually honour herself.
I asked her how she felt as she considered the recent events of the past week. She was numb. She felt nothing in her body. As we started to tap generally on that, we discussed why it was ‘safer’ to numb out, and why that had proven a useful strategy in the past. We then went deeper and tapped on the possible benefits of feeling and experiencing life fully – even if that was emotionally painful – because at least that showed she was alive.
During this time she said her heart felt as though it had been cracked open, so we tapped on that sensation and the anxieties that surrounded that. The biggest a-ha for her was when we reframed the experience and tapped on being a role model for her young daughter, demonstrating what it meant to feel not only joy and happiness, but hurt, pain and grief. She realized how appalled she would feel if her daughter was stuffing down her emotions and not expressing how she felt. She said she didn’t want her daughter to grow up into a robot (like her).
It was a massively powerful start to our session: the hurt in her heart healed; she understood the power of showing emotions, for her own sake and that of her daughter, and she was actually delighted to feel the sadness. She said it was ‘a relief to feel’. We then continued with the “original problem” for the second part of the session.
Did we dissolve the trauma resulting from recent events? Absolutely not. But what transpired was the first step: she gave herself permission to feel the pain and sadness so she could start grieving. She allowed herself to BE – to BE ALIVE. And she agreed that was a lot better than living as an empty shell.
If you feel as though you’ve been living as an empty shell and you are numb to apparently painful events around you, you may find the following tapping transcript useful. If you are new to EFT, click on tapping points to view a map of the meridian points.
Even though I’m numb and I don’t feel, I accept myself anyway
Even though it’s safer to be that way and I’m afraid to feel, I accept all of me
Even though there is a really big part of me that doesn’t want to feel, there’s a wiser and more powerful part of me that longs to be alive and experience ALL aspects of life, so I’ve decided to allow that part of me to grow now
Head: I can’t feel
eyebrow: I don’t want to feel
side of eye: I’m afraid to feel
under eye: I’m numb and it’s easier to be that way
under nose: being numb means I can carry on
chin: being numb means I can remain detached
collarbone: being numb is strong
under arm: no it isn’t!
head: being numb is breaking my heart
eyebrow: only I don’t feel it
side of eye: being numb is causing my body to tighten
under eye: only I don’t feel it
under nose: being numb is disconnecting me from life
chin: and that is exhausting
collarbone: what if I could feel safe enough to feel something?
under arm: I’m open to the possibility that I would know I was alive once I started feeling!
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. You might need to repeat this process or feel free to change the wording so it applies to how you really feel. The phrases you use are simply a way of outwardly expressing how you’re feeling. You don’t need to be creative or get hung up on finding the “perfect” wording – just state what’s on your mind.
January 28, 2013
I was in the UK for Christmas and New Year and I saw the slogan, Keep Calm and Carry On, on mugs, place mats and bags. Taken from the propaganda poster produced by the British Government in 1939 to raise morale, it made me chuckle as I passed shop windows in 2012.
So, when I learned my husband had been involved in a head on collision on his motorbike in Peru at the beginning of January, I realised I didn’t want to “keep calm” or “carry on”; nor did I want to “calm down”. I needed to wail. I needed to sob. I was devastated.
There was so little information at first, so of course, my mind made up all kinds of stories! Finally, I found out that his bike was a write off, and most of his equipment and luggage was ruined, but he had his life. Considering the impact, it is a miracle that he survived. He is now home, in Canada, battered and bruised, and in a lot of pain. The emotional and mental hurts are deeper than the physical hurts however.
And so we take one day at a time.
Sometimes, when life falls apart, the natural tendency is to make a great effort to remain calm, and keep going; to soldier on. People often comment, “isn’t she doing well, under the circumstances?”, or “he’s a real trooper”. However, all we’re doing is suppressing how we truly feel. And there is a deeply rooted part of us that needs to express what we’re thinking and feeling.
So, to honour that part of us that is squashed down and often ignored during times of crisis, I’ve created a tapping transcript. If it’s not relevant in your life now, please feel free to keep it so you can use it another time. Please respect the part of you that deserves to be heard.
If you are new to EFT, click on tapping points to view a map of the meridian points.
Even though I’m scared and desperate, I really should keep going, so I accept myself deeply and completely
Even though they expect me to keep calm and carry on at this time, I don’t feel at all calm, and I want to _____________ [insert your choice: run away, cry and cry, be held, etc], so I accept all of me
Even though I’m not coping at all well with this situation and I should be stronger, I still accept who I am and how I’m feeling
Even though I shouldn’t be thinking of myself at this time, I accept myself for giving myself a voice
head: I’m so afraid
eyebrow: I’m hurting deeply
side of eye: I want to _____________ [insert what you want/need to do]
under eye: I’m expected to keep calm and carry on
under nose: they expect me to do that
chin: I expect myself to do that
collarbone: the world expects me to do that
under arm: and I don’t want to be calm,
head: and I don’t feel able to carry on
eyebrow: I’m not coping at all well
side of eye: and that’s ok!
under eye: who says I have to cope well?
under nose: why must I fit into a box and follow someone else’s rules?
chin: this is a terrible time and I need to express that
collarbone: I’m giving myself permission to acknowledge ME
underarm: I’m allowing myself to feel my pain.
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. You might need to repeat this process or feel free to change the wording so it applies to how you really feel. The phrases you use are simply a way of outwardly expressing how you’re feeling. You don’t need to be creative or get hung up on finding the “perfect” wording – just state what’s on your mind and remember, opening yourself to vulnerability allows you to connect with your authentic self.
January 23, 2013
Over the course of my life I have consistently felt like a square peg in a round hole. At no time was I more definite about that than when I moved from the UK to Canada in 1998. I felt so different, so out of place – I simply couldn’t relate to anyone or anything. The way I spoke was different, the things I found funny were different; even the food I was eating was different from what I was accustomed to in the UK.
I definitely believed I was misunderstood.
As I learned EFT and started to heal and grow as a result I realized that being a square peg in a round hole was something to celebrate. I had unique gifts and I wanted to explore that even more with you today. So perhaps you may want to consider a time when you felt out of place or uncomfortable in a situation. Perhaps someone was judging you or misunderstanding you and how we can do some EFT to become a little bit more comfortable and accepting of who you are and what you have to offer the world. So that rather than it being a burden to being a square peg in a round hole it is something to celebrate.
Before we start tapping I ask that you take full responsibility of yourself, your emotional, spiritual, mental and physical well being as we tap and as we finish tapping.
Lets start by tapping the karate chop point.
Even though I feel like I don’t fit in, I really want to accept myself because I am doing my best.
Even though I feel like a square peg in a round hole and I felt that way most of my life
Maybe its time to start celebrating how unique I am
Even though they really don’t get me I deserve to treat myself with a little more compassion anyway
Top of head: I don’t fit in
Eyebrow: I feel uncomfortable
Side of eye: they don’t understand me
Under eye: and I really don’t understand them
Under nose: This is really hard for me
Chin: I want to fit in
Collarbone: and I feel so uncomfortable all the time
Under arm: I feel as though they’re judging me
Top of head: I know they misunderstand me
Eyebrow: What’s wrong with me
Side of eye: What’s right with me
Under eye: I wonder what would happen if I could focus on that
Under nose: I am unique
Chin: I have a square peg
Collarbone: What if that is something to celebrate
Under arm: I’m starting to realize I have many things worth celebrating
Top of head: I want to want to celebrate them
Eyebrow: and maybe now is the perfect time to do that
Side of eye: I spent a very long time questioning what’s wrong with me
Under eye: simply because I feel so different
Under nose: maybe its time to start honouring what’s right with me
Chin: simply because I’m unique
Collarbone: I’m loving the shift in my perspective
Under arm: I am truly grateful I can celebrate who I am now
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. Notice any changes you may feel in your body after tapping. And perhaps it is time to go back and work on any specific events where you definitely felt out of place and uncomfortable, where you felt misunderstood and judged because “ they didn’t get me” and perhaps the technique on those events.
I wish you well with your tapping and I wish you well in celebrating exactly who you are and the unique gifts you have to offer.
December 27, 2012
If you’re tapping on a particularly long term experience or challenge than I suggest you build your EFT into your daily routine. I usually recommend to my clients that they tap at the same time every day as a consistent way of tapping, for example, after they’ve had breakfast and before they clean their teeth.
Once you add EFT into your daily routine at a regular time it just becomes natural and you don’t even need to think about having to do it because it is part of your routine.
December 5, 2012
“I am in remission of Crohn’s Disease,” my client said at the beginning of our EFT Skype session last week. “My symptoms are no longer Crohn’s.”
Is there a time to celebrate? … Yes.
When? … Any time in the moment.
“Jennifer” told me the wonderful news with a huge smile on her face. When we had first met in November 2011, she was terrified, hopeless, and housebound. It’s because of her persistence – her dedication to her healing – that she’s where she is now in just one year. I am so very proud of her and in that moment, I cried. They were tears of joy, and tears of appreciation for her commitment to her health. It was certainly a time to celebrate.
As anyone reading this who knows about Crohn’s is aware, Jennifer’s healing journey has been far from easy. There have been countless times when she felt completely helpless and alone, believing nothing could change and she would be confined to the house, a very limited diet, and chronic pain, for life.
However, despite it all, Jennifer always found time to celebrate during our EFT sessions. She was always conscious of the incremental progress. No matter how awful her day may have been, she always noted in her journal at least one blessing. That meant that as we tapped on all the painful experiences, we could also embrace the accomplishments, no matter how apparently small. This was a brilliant way of raising her vibration and re-focusing her attention.
So, as we approach the Holiday Season, and things may feel intense or overwhelming, lonely or hopeless, I invite you to celebrate the “small things”. No matter how debilitated you may feel for one reason or another, I know there is something within you, or outside of you, for which to show gratitude.
Last week “Jennifer” and I celebrated a milestone in her journey against Crohn’s. That celebration was built upon many little ones throughout the year.
Think back to who you were this time last year. Who have you become? What have you accomplished? What insights have you had? Please consider things that may appear inconsequential.
Sometimes we may not notice many changes, but if we cast our minds back 12 months, we may surprise ourselves by the number of changes. As the saying goes, “the attention is in the detail”. Make a note of each change and tap them in. Acknowledge yourself for being you. And while it is appropriate to celebrate at any time, it is particularly so as the year draws to its end and another is about to begin.
Thank you for reading my newsletters this year. I have greatly appreciated your feedback, and getting to know some of you as clients, and students.
I wish you a peaceful holiday season, and a new year filled with ease and grace.
-
November 7, 2012
What can a crab teach us about vulnerability?
The crab is covered by a hard outer shell, an exoskeleton. This shell is hard and inflexible and protects the crab from outside attack. But did you know that as the crab grows, its outer shell does not grow with it?
This means that if the crab were to stay inside the shell, it would suffocate. Ironically, what once offered an armour plating of protection, ultimately limits the growth and development of the crab.
The crab knows this, so its only choice is to shed the shell in order to survive. The challenge with this is that its body is now left exposed and vulnerable to attack.
Two years ago, I came to realise I had outgrown my “armour”, and I was suffocating underneath. Like the crab I had to shed my shell, so that I could breath, survive and grow.
Did my decision make me vulnerable to ‘attack’? Absolutely! As I started to express myself; as I started to BE myself, rather than holding back and presenting the armour plating to the world, I was told, “you’re too emotional”, and “you’re too sensitive”. People didn’t like that I spoke out, and I spoke up. I learned how to be assertive, and serve my needs, while respecting the needs of others at the same time.
Was this an easy process? Heck, no! It was the biggest and most demanding stage of my life, but at that time, I knew that if I were to continue growing, so I could become everything I was put on this earth to be, I could not stay in the same place.
Perhaps you are protecting yourself from the outside world and it’s starting to suffocate you, too. You cannot become all you are meant to be by staying in the same place, doing what you’re already doing. Change does take courage, and vulnerability, but it’s my belief that the pay off of being able to move freely and breathe, is worth it.
If this is creating thoughts and feelings within you, you may find this month’s tapping transcript useful. If you are new to EFT, click on tapping points to view a map of the meridian points.
Even though I need to protect myself, I accept myself for this
Even though I’m very afraid to shed this protective armour so that I can move forward, I accept myself and how all of this is making me feel
Even though I’m starting to realise that by staying protected, I’m suffocating, and that feels very uncomfortable, now is the perfect time to treat myself with a little more kindness and compassion
Head: I need to protect myself
Eyebrow: that’s what I’ve always done
Side of eye: I can’t shed this protective armour I’ve built around me
Under eye: I’d be too exposed
Under nose: I’d be too vulnerable
Chin: I’d be showing them who I truly am
Collarbone: they may not like that
Under arm: they may attack me
Head: but by being this way, I’m suffocating
Eyebrow: I’m not happy
Side of eye: I’m not fulfilled
Under eye: I’d love to break free of this
Under nose: and I’m very afraid
Chin: so I’m acknowledging the fear, and what that means to me
Collarbone: I deserve to be myself
Under arm: what if it were surprisingly easy to be myself?
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. You might need to repeat this process or feel free to change the wording so it applies to how you really feel. The phrases you use are simply a way of outwardly expressing how you’re feeling. You don’t need to be creative or get hung up on finding the “perfect” wording – just state what’s on your mind and remember, opening yourself to vulnerability allows you to connect with your authentic self.
October 4, 2012
“I’m not good enough…”
“…I don’t know enough. I’m not confident enough. I’m afraid I’ll make a mistake. Others will question me. What will I say?…”
Is this the self talk that goes on for you whenever you consider putting yourself ‘out there’ or taking the next step?
Last month, I taught a 4-day Level 1 and 2 EFT workshop to a phenomenal group of students. They were really excited about EFT and its potential, and they couldn’t wait to start using it on their friends and family. When, at the end of the four days, I asked how many of them wanted to be an EFT Practitioner, working with paying clients, all 14 students put their hands up! It was very exciting to observe their passion and desire to help others.
Then we started discussing the “yeah, buts” that were coming up for them: what might hold them back; why they couldn’t put themselves out there yet. The biggest stumbling block was
“I’m not good enough and I need more practice.”
Since many of them had only been using EFT for 4 days, I agreed they certainly needed more practice, yet there was a part of me which had to question,
“When will you be good enough?”
I asked it because “I’m not good enough” is something Alina Frank and I have heard a lot in the past from students in our Jump Start Your EFT Practice programme. In fact, I believe it’s the number one reason why the majority of gifted, passionate EFT Practitioners are unable to create the business they want and deserve. They convince themselves they’re not good enough because they don’t have enough credentials, or they’re not good enough to charge a fee which reflects their true value. By tapping through their blocks to success, and teaching them the right skill and mind set, we’ve witnessed our students turn their hobbies into thriving practices!
Believing we are not good enough at something is self-limiting and keeps us defeated and stuck. It prevents growth and expansion, and tragically, it prevents others from benefiting from our gifts. They lose out because we are playing small.
It breaks my heart knowing that there is so much potential in all of us, which is being underused or repressed because of a past wound: a comment or response from a parent or a teacher, for example.
If this is striking a chord with you, and you often find yourself holding back because the belief “I’m not good enough” is so strong and debilitating, then you may find the following tap-along useful.
If this sounds familiar to you, and you feel ready to embrace your potential, rather than limiting yourself, you may find my tapping script helpful. If you are new to EFT, click on tapping points to view a map of the meridian points.
Even though I’m not good enough, I accept myself anyway
Even though the evidence is all around me that I’m not good enough, I accept all of me
Even though there’s a part of me which has always believed I’m not good enough, there’s a wiser and more powerful part of me which is starting to question where this belief started and what it would take to let it go. I’m listening to that wiser part of me now.
Head: I’m not good enough
Eyebrow: that’s what they told me
Side of eye: it was their point of view
Under eye: and I believed them
Under nose: I wonder why I chose to do that?
Chin: probably because they were right
Collarbone: I’ve proven I’m not good enough
Under arm: that’s my life story!
Head: or maybe that’s THEIR story
Eyebrow: I’ve taken on something which never even belonged to me!
Side of eye: I believed their judgment of me
Under eye: and now is the perfect time to un-believe it
Under nose: who gave them the rule book?
Chin: what if I could be good enough?
Collarbone: what if I’m good enough already?
Under arm: I’m ready and willing to be good enough already.
Now close your eyes and take a deep but comfortable breath. You might need to repeat this process or feel free to change the wording so it applies to how you really feel. The phrases you use are simply a way of outwardly expressing how you’re feeling. You don’t need to be creative or get hung up on finding the “perfect” wording – just state what’s on your mind.
Step bravely into the unknown. “Good enough” is a work in progress, one that begins while you,re still at the “I’m not good enough” stage!