"I've already broken my New Year's Resolutions!"
2009 is upon us, and for many, a new year is the time for making resolutions. At this time of year, many of us are determined and committed to accomplishing our goals. Yet within a short amount of time, the goal seems like too much hard work, or we lose interest, or we can't find the time to follow through. Rather than feeling excitement or joy about the resolution, we start to resent it: it is something horrible we have to do.
The best way to approach resolutions is to consider how your life will be different once you have accomplished your goal. Why do you want this goal and how will you feel once you have achieved it? Moreover, how will your life be different when the goal has been accomplished?
Towards the end of last year, I decided the beginning of 2009 was going to be different. I have put a lot on hold during the past two years while I set up my business: My social life has been severely compromised; weekends were spent working; I didn't have time to pursue my interests or exercise properly. In short, there was no balance to my life.
So, as 2008 came to a close, I made a list of all the things I would love to accomplish in the upcoming year, and then listened as all the negative self-talk and limiting self-beliefs rose up inside of me. Believe me, there were plenty! How would I find the time? How could I afford to do that? What if I lost motivation? What if I didn't have the energy?
I refused to feel overwhelmed or hopeless at this point. Instead, I wrote out each goal, how I would feel when I achieved the goal, and how my life would be different by reaching the goal. Then I listed all the reasons why I believed I couldn't possibly achieve it. For example, one of my dreams has been to learn to sing properly, and I decided to make that a goal for 2009. Singing well would make me feel free and creative. It would bring balance into my life away from work. It would inspire me to join a choir, meet new people and enjoy new experiences. There were several limiting beliefs about this: how could I get to classes when I don't even have a car (a huge problem!)? How could I fit this into my work schedule? What if it was expensive? Who was I to think that I could sing?
And then I got tapping! I rated the intensity on each 'problem' and tapped through, clearing each one. As I cleared the limiting beliefs, the possibility of achieving my goal became a probability. Three weeks later, I have had three singing lessons, I drive myself to class because I'm now leasing a car (yippeeee!), and I feel so energised and excited as I practice at home.
Below is a tapping transcript for you to shake up all that resistance to changing and moving forwards towards your goal. There may be secondary benefits to staying where you are now, and EFT can clear that.
With your dominant hand, tap the karate chop point on the other hand while saying the following:
Even though there is a part of me which is resistant to change, there's a greater part of me which longs to _________________ [exercise, become slimmer, start playing the piano, learn Spanish, etc] and I want to connect to that part of me now
Even though there are lots of obstacles preventing me from reaching my goal, I want to accept myself for doing my best
Even though I really want to achieve my goal this time, I'm still not sure I can really do it, I want to honour all of these feelings, knowing I deserve to fulfil my dreams.
Now tap the following places while saying each of the phrases below.
Top of the head: all these obstacles which prevent me from achieving my goal
Eyebrow: all these doubts and excuses stopping me from achieving my goal
Side of the eye: all this resistance to changing
Under the eye: this is too hard
Under the nose: and I don't know if I can do this
Chin: I don't know if I really want to do this!
Collarbone: Yes I do!
Under the arm: I deserve to change
Top of the head: I deserve to accomplish my goals
Eyebrow: I wonder what would happen if I did achieve my goal?
Side of the eye: Who could I be?
Under the eye: I'm afraid
Under the nose: and I want to accept myself anyway
Chin: this feels like a good time for change
Collarbone: I'm ready to let go of any resistance I feel
Under the arm: and I choose to make this surprisingly easy.
Disclaimer: In tapping along to this transcript, you take full responsibility for your health and well being.
About the author: Annabel Fisher is a licensed NLP Practitioner and runs a successful EFT practice. Find relief from pain, chronic illness, fears and phobias, headaches and migraines, weight issues and more through EFT. Get your free "The Essentials of EFT Guide" plus one-hour EFT Q&A audio recording by signing up for her newsletter at: www.theefthealingcentre.com.